It was very hard to get out of bed this morning. I went to bed too late and then it was storming in the morning, and I just wanted to roll around and then bake a cake instead of getting up and going to class. Particularly because I knew I had to walk instead of riding my skateboard, as I don't want the bearings to get ruined before I get around to changing them. The bus going westbound was half an hour coming, so I barely got to my morning class on time. And insult to injury, the lecture was on Coleridge and Wordsworth and the professor continually digressed into this oedipal complex he really wants Coleridge to have had towards Wordsworth. It's interesting theory otherwise and I'm glad to be retaining it, but I nearly fell asleep in class. In fact, I walked out of the lecture hall, lay down on the floor and slept for an hour. I didn't want to go to my French class but I got myself up, consoled my tummy with a Snickers bar and rolled into the LL building right on time.What a morning. It doesn't seem to be thundering anymore, at least, so I should be able to get my swim in before I go home. At home, I need to work on that design project for tomorrow, the reading for my American Lit class and some of my French workbook. Perhaps I'll save the reading for work tonight, Monday nights are usually slow.
I really dislike laziness. I dislike it in myself when I notice it. I don't feel I was being lazy this morning, I spent all morning - save for that hour slumming it on the floor - struggling to stay awake. The degree to which one works is what matters, not the amount of things one accomplishes. Way to be obvious, lamp. There's this guy at work who is constantly lazy. He only puts in four hours a week at the sporting goods store because he sells his plasma every week and I guess turns enough of a profit to pay his rent and buy enough booze for the next week. That's lazy, I think, but I can't really blame him because it's a sporting goods store and we're all being paid beans. Not even magic beans. Perhaps it makes sense now that I say I am interested in making a large amount of money in a small amount of time because I'm afraid I don't have the capacity to make a large amount of money steadily over a long period of time.
The first question is "how." The other question is "why am I babbling about this crap when I should be going to the gym." I briefly considered egg donation yesterday, deciding eventually that the fertility drugs, minor surgery and health monitoring would overshadow the altruistic and even monetary benefits. (I considered for a while the order of those benefits, eventually deciding that this entry is about money and not altruism. I am not a bad person, har har.) I took a survey at the Psychology department here that will hopefully result in a few opportunities to wear a heart-rate monitor and tell them about my childhood for cash money. Does this make me lazy? I guess I could quit my job, find one that allowed me to start on as few hours as being a full-time student allows with more pay and fewer annoyances. Or could I? I don't think it's actually possible, maybe I'm wrong. Even if I could, would the very act of finding work that pays more for doing less be lazy in itself? You see how I'm stuck here.
